Have you been hurt, let down or betrayed by someone you trusted? Has a relationship gone sour, has there been infidelity and you are finding it difficult to move on or reconcile? Whatever has happened in the past that caused the complicated emotional response, like anger or bitterness, the idea of “letting go” can sometimes be challenging.
Many people relive the story of what happened for years after the event, like a broken record repeating on a loop, reinforcing the emotional pain and the self-sabotaging story that goes with it.
Emotional pain is not to be trivialised. Betrayal and breaking up might be experienced as loss, but it’s not like the grief we feel when someone dies. In a way, some people might find that easier, but when the other person is still alive and on the scene, the emotional loss is different. It’s more about losing the future you thought you had, losing the connection, losing part of the family, losing the closeness or losing a best friend. It can knock your confidence or self-esteem.
This pain is not just in your head, it has a biological impact too. The stress of the situation and the hormones of cortisol and adrenaline can lead to anxiety, illness, withdrawal from social events and depression, if it goes on for too long.
If this has happened to you, an important thing to remember is: Letting Go is not the same as “letting off the hook”. Let that sentence sink in. This is vital if you want to be free. And even more importantly, you have to really want to be free, more than wanting to stay stuck.
Friends and family may think they are giving sound advice – forgive and forget, forgive and reconcile, move on, forget about it – and you might want to, but can’t. If this is you, it is not your fault. Your brain holds on because the thoughts, feelings and behaviour have been woven into a pattern, a story your brain repeats, a programme that gets triggered again and again. Perhaps if you think of the person, if you see them, if you hear about them or if you are continually blaming them for what happened, and justifying it.
The truth is, holding on to “The Story” hurts nobody but you. Forgiveness – letting go – is about freeing yourself from the emotional weight that holds you back.
In no way does this imply condoning any behaviour, in fact it has nothing to do with the other person. It’s about freeing yourself from the past, finding yourself again, showing up for life, building your confidence and self-esteem and finding inner peace.
BWRT (BrainWorking Recursive Therapy) works directly with the neural pathways in your brain, helping you to come to terms with and release the past with freedom and joy. If you want to create a better future filled with confidence and healthy self-esteem, BWRT helps your brain establish and reinforce a more positive empowering future, free of emotional pain.
Once the brain views this better future as possible, plausible and fair it will co-operate. As long as you really want to change and are willing to “give away” the negative feelings, your brain can be restored, renewed and revitalised through the power of your intention. We get your imagination working for you as we implement the process and your brain does the rest.
Don’t suffer any longer. Get in touch and book your free 30 minute consultation with me.
Message me, or email me directly – mary@innerspacehypnotherapy.co.uk