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“In the midst of movement and chaos, keep stillness inside of you.” – Anonymous.

I find the practice of a regular mini meditation to be a great benefit in staying calm. You can slot it into your day around whatever else you are doing.

Professor Daniel Siegel, UCLA School of Medicine, says that “Relaxation is good but it doesn’t provide the psychological changes you see in mindfulness practice.” There is no need to sit for hours on a cushion, you can reap the rewards of meditation in just three minutes a day. It’s safe and effective and brings many benefits.

Professor Siegel advises a building a daily habit, just like brushing your teeth. The brain loves repetition more than duration. He says “Mindfulness meditation is a form of brain hygiene, it cleans out and strengthens the synaptic connections in the brain”.

As well as being good for the brain, meditation helps to reduce stress and anxiety, improve sleep, boost mood and energy, build emotional resilience, restore a sense of calm, enhance creativity and problem solving skills, reduce pain, boost the immune system and slow down the ageing process.

It’s easy to find three minutes in the day, or enjoy taking as long as you want to. You can do a mini meditation whenever you’re waiting for someone so it’s not a waste of time. I love sitting somewhere in nature and tuning in.
When you are used to daily practice, you may find that you can tap into the stillness any time, eyes open or closed.

3 Easy Steps

Prepare by setting your intention to find the stillness within. Adopt a beginner’s mind and be curious about your experience. Sit or lie down somewhere safe and comfortable.

1. Close your eyes and tune in to your experience for one minute or so, what do you notice? Any heaviness or lightness? Warmth or coolness? Just notice what’s going on for you just now.
2. Pay attention to your breath without trying to change anything. Spend about a minute observing the breath as you inhale and exhale. When your mind wanders, bring it back to the breath, without fuss.
3. Notice the sounds around you and the silence in between, no need to label anything, just notice. Do this for another minute or so and slowly bring yourself back and open your eyes.

Of course, you can stay there longer if you want to. Regular daily practice of 3 minutes has a cumulative beneficial effect on wellbeing, it’s a great habit that can be part of your self-care routine.

The weekend is over and it’s Monday again. For many, it’s back to the grindstone, getting up early, working hard and feeling tired already.

I don’t know about you, but I love Mondays and I love the excitement of a fresh start. It’s a new opportunity to get back on track with motivation and desire to advance towards achieving our goals.

There are 3 good reasons why Mondays can be a fresh exciting start. First, it’s a brand new week with a new energy and unlimited potential. Second, Mondays are a good time for planning. By taking small steps we can move forward in leaps and bounds in seven days. Third, Mondays are a great time for motivation. We can use the start of a new week to motivate ourselves to take action and get things done.

Here are 10 tips for making the most of Mondays:

1. Take a little time to set some goals for the week. What do you want to accomplish? What would be the best thing?
2. What are your compelling reasons for wanting this? Write three reasons why it’s important to you.
3. What will be the benefits of achieving your goal this week? Write down three benefits. Visualise and emotionalise yourself taking action and feeling proud of your achievement, happy that you stuck to your guns.
4. Plan ahead. Break the goal down into a few steps and schedule them into your diary. Make a commitment to yourself, you are worth it!
5. Anticipate any obstacles that might try to sabotage you and think of fun ways to overcome them.
6. Get yourself organized. Monday is a good time to declutter and create some space. An organised environment creates positive energy that will help you stay on track.
7. Eat healthy food and avoid sugar spikes that lead to a dip in energy and motivation.
8. Build exercise into your day. Exercise helps to relieve stress, improve sleep, boost your immune system and slow down the ageing process. All activity and movement counts. Make it a healthy habit, any exercise is better than no exercise.
9. Schedule in some quality time with friends or family during the week. Good quality connection with others builds emotional resilience.
10. Be kind to yourself, you are amazing. Speak to yourself like you would speak to your best friend.

By following these steps on a Monday, you are setting yourself up for success, making it more likely you will have a productive week. So make Mondays matter and enjoy them!

If you are finding it hard to get motivated or achieve a goal, and would like some help, get in touch with me for a free consultation. Hypnosis and BWRT are great tools to overcome obstacles, break through emotional blocks and reprogramme the mind for success.

Hi there, I hope you are doing well today.  If you are anything like me, life can be pretty hectic sometimes.  It’s all go go go.  I’m taking some time out this morning to enjoy the sunshine streaming in through the window as I sit here with my cup of early morning tea.

I have a morning routine that includes meditation and exercise and I am usually up early so that I can set myself up for the day.  I love it when the house is quiet and I can tune into the still peaceful energy that comes before the activities of the day.  This is part of my self care routine.

Self care is not about being selfish, it is about giving ourselves a little time and attention too.  Everyone who has ever flown on an airplane knows that if the oxygen mask drops down, you have to put yours on first, before you can help anyone else.  This is such a good analogy for looking after ourselves.

Some of the people who come to see me say they suffer from stress, they feel overwhelmed by the pressures of life and find it hard to switch off.  When they are supposed to be relaxing they are thinking of work or trying to solve some problem or other.  One of the skills I teach them is a mini-meditation, a brief relaxation exercise that has the power to reduce stress and bring balance and harmony to the mind and body, when practiced regularly.  I encourage them to do it at least twice a day for at least a couple of weeks to see the difference it makes.

As well as things like going for a walk, sitting in the sunlight, having a lovely bath or a nice cup of tea, anything  that you enjoy doing, a brief meditation can give you the boost you need and restore a sense of calmness. The steps are simple and once you have done it a few times you can use it in many different scenarios.

I recently did a podcast with Dr. Sammy, a medical doctor in the U.K.  (see my last blog post for more details).  In the podcast I guide you through a Heart Focused Relaxation exercise, and teach you how to do it for yourself.  The audio extract is linked below.  It  is just 10 minutes long, and when you have learned the steps you can do it for yourself anytime, taking as long or as little time as you need.

There are three main steps in the exercise:

1. Shift your focus from the thinking mind to the feeling heart.
2. Breathe a little slower and a little deeper than normal, and find an easy comfortable rhythm.
3. Activate a feeling of love, care, appreciation or gratitude for someone or something in your life.

From here, I encourage you to spend a few moments connecting to and feeling the elevated emotion, and then radiate this uplifting feeling to every cell in your body.  Then, if you want to, radiate the positive feeling to the world around you.

When you complete the three steps,  you can add some positive affirmations or imagine yourself doing something that you want to do – achieving a goal of some sort, or just sit in the calmness until you are ready to move on with the day.

Click on the link to access the audio: Guided Heart Focused Relaxation Exercise

I love this quote from Carl Jung, it’s a good one to remember at the beginning of every day:

“I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become”

Feel free to let me know how you get on or if you have any questions.  I’d love to hear from you.

Inner Space – Your Safe Place.

Have you ever really wanted to do something and felt really excited about it, but at the same time a bit nervous?  I can relate.  That was me last week.  I had butterflies in my stomach and my heart was beating faster.  I was preparing to talk on a podcast for the very first time and in that moment I stepped into a space called the “creative growing edge” which was outside my known comfort zone, and into a brand new experience for me.

I was over the moon to be invited as a guest on the “Surrender and Manifest” podcast, hosted by Dr. Sammy – a medical doctor in the U.K.  She talks with her guests about personal growth and mindset, and blends her knowledge of psychology, early childhood development and neurobiology in order to help her listeners to understand more about themselves and how their brains works.

On this episode, we discuss how I got to where I am today, my journey to become a Clinical Hypnotherapist and BWRT (BrainWorking Recursive Therapy) Practitioner, and I share some interesting issues I have helped my clients to overcome, including an unusual phobia and a case of childhood abuse.

I also share some tips to build emotional resilience, and you can find out how I helped one client to activate her Inner Cheetah.  Dr. Sammy does a great job of summarising the main points so you have a take away.

At the end of the podcast, we do a guided 10 minute Heart focused relaxation exercise which is a simple, powerful technique that builds emotional resilience, lowers stress, boosts the immune system and creates a natural state of harmony and balance that connects mind, body and spirit.

You can click on the link below to have a listen, you may hear something that resonates with you.  If you have any questions, please get in touch.  I would love to hear from you, and if I can help you with anything, just ask.

Inner Space – Your Safe Place

Surrender and Manifest Podcast – “Activate Your Inner Cheetah”

We may recognise the obvious signs of anxiety in ourselves or in others but some people are good at hiding it and put on a brave face.  Like the iceberg, only 10% is above the surface while 90% remains hidden.

Many clients that come to me for help with anxiety issues say that they feel isolated and alone as they battle with the symptoms. They often believe that no one would believe they have anxiety issues as they appear confident, and they are embarrassed to admit it.  That in itself can be another sign of anxiety – worrying about what other people think, and believing that if they show any vulnerability it will mean they are not good enough or not perfect enough. Perfectionism is another one of those signs.

Anxiety is meant to warn us of immediate danger and it works very well most of the time. We rise to a challenge, deal with the situation and return to homeostasis, a psychologically balanced state of mind and body.   However, chronic anxiety is a habit learned by the brain.  It’s a process of faulty pattern matching that uses up a lot of energy and can lead to ill health, low self-esteem, lack of motivation and diminished levels of confidence. Over time, it can negatively influence our self image and core identity.

Trauma, at a young age especially, can leave an imprint in the brain that pre-disposes a person to suffer from anxiety. It may manifest later in life as feeling insecure in relationships, binge eating, alcohol or drug dependence, perfectionism or some other psychological problem. The trauma happened in the past, but the brain activates responses in the present, predicting a future based on historical events.

Although we can’t see what goes on beneath the surface, there are tell-tale signs to look out for, including insomnia, lack of concentration, irritability, avoidance or feelings of guilt or loneliness.

Pop-Ups

If your computer malfunctions, gets a virus or is infected with some sort of bug, you might get lots of annoying pop-up messages that divert your attention, slowing the machine down and causing problems.  Anxiety can cause pop-up messages too, in the form of worrisome or obsessive intrusive thoughts.  Negative thoughts can run on a loop either consciously or beneath the surface as a result of past trauma, anxiety or limiting beliefs, indicating an underlying faulty programme.

Programmes can be rewritten and updates can be installed.  Neuroplasticity means we can change patterns of activity in the brain, redirecting the neural pathways and changing our automatic responses.

Hypnotherapy and BWRT (BrainWorking Recursive Therapy) are excellent tools that can rewrite the unhelpful programmes that cause anxiety.  You can’t get rid of anxiety altogether as it’s part of the survival mechanism but you can retrain your brain to be more discerning, to offer you a better option, a better choice, when there is no immediate threat.  You might prefer to activate a calm, neutral or confident feeling instead of anxiety.  In fact, you can choose how you want to feel in any given situation when you retrain your brain.

Five things to remember if you are experiencing anxiety:

1. Instead of judging yourself, be kind to yourself, you matter;
2. You are not alone, lots of people, just like you and me, suffer from anxiety too;
3. Most things in life are not permanent, everything passes;
4. Don’t take things personally, the world is not out to get you and most people are doing their best;
5. Help is out there, asking for help is not a weakness, it is a strength.

Jan suffered from anxiety and depression for many years.  She noticed a difference after just one session.

“I was recommended to Mary by a friend. At the time I was in a very dark place, suffering from anxiety and deep depression. Just after one session with Mary, I could not believe the difference I felt. As the weeks went by with each session I felt more calm, relaxed and positive. I would not hesitate in recommending Mary to anyone that needs help. She has truly been an inspiration and huge help to me.” -Jan

Philip was new to anxiety and had never had a panic attack before.  He discovered how to neutralise the anxiety,  change his automatic thinking habits and activate positive feelings, and he was back at work in no time.

“I was apprehensive at first as my anxieties and panic attacks were new to me. Mary helped me to understand and re work my thinking and now I am back to work and am my old self once again. She has also helped countless others and some close friends to the family also. A truly wonderful lady and in a tricky profession, shines brightly. Thank you again.” -Phillip

Don’t suffer in silence, talk to someone who knows how to help.  If you experience the signs of anxiety and want to retrain your brain, get in touch with me for more information.  I offer a free, no obligation, 30 minute consultation to see if what I do can help you.

Happy New Year One and All.

There are many wonderful wishes and aspirations circulating the world today.

Time for New Year’s resolutions and goal setting for many.

The old year is gone and a new one is just beginning.

I wish you Inner Peace.

I read some ancient words of wisdom recently which I’d like to pass on:

“Make your life simple”. 

We often complicate things when there is no need to.

A simple life leads to inner peace.

Strive for harmony in all your relationships.

Harmony in all your relationships will lead to inner peace.

Inner peace will give you clarity of mind so you can see your way forward from a new perspective.

Clarity of mind helps you to see the bigger picture of where you are on your life journey.

Listen to your body, it speaks to you via sensations and feelings. 

Harmony feels right, disharmony feels as if something is not quite right.

Always deal with any sign of disharmony immediately by asking yourself:

1. How am I complicating things?
2. How am I contributing to this?
3. How can I make my life simple?
4. What can I do now that will lead to inner peace?
5. When am I going to do it?

Make your life simple  – declutter you life, declutter your mind and learn how to let go.

“Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realise they were the big things.”
–  Robert Brault

Here’s to a healthy happy New Year!

www.innerspacehypnotherapy.co.uk

#innerpeace

#simplelife

#harmony

#relationships

#hypnotherapymiltonkeynes

#bwrtmiltonkeynes

Do you have a goal or a strong desire to change in some way? do you want to live life in the flow, feeling calm, organised and comfortable with clear focused thinking.  Would you prefer to feel emotionally grounded and have all the confidence you need so that you can perform at your best, at work, in your relationships and enjoy life to the full?

Does that sound like your ideal self?

Would it excite you to think that you can achieve that goal?  There may be doubts at this point but read on.

Think about where you are now and your current situation.

What is standing in your way of already being that person?

There are lots of reasons why someone goes around the loop of repeating the same old patterns again and again, and gets stuck somewhere on the way.  That then becomes the norm.

It’s not about the problems you have faced up to now. It’s not about the people in your life; it’s not about your past or current circumstances.

• It’s about the programmes that are running in your brain;
• It’s about your mindset – your beliefs and attitudes;
• It’s about being able to identify the limiting beliefs you hold and the thinking patterns that keep you stuck;
• It’s about having a compelling reason to change and making a decision to move forward;
• It’s about having a vision that inspires you.

So how do you get from where you are now to where you want to be?

The desire to change has to be greater than the desire to stay the same.

When you decide to change for the better, you step onto “The Creative Growing Edge”.  This is the edge of your current known space – the familiar comfort zone.  From here you enter creative space and experience something new, a shift from the old familiar patterns of thinking and behaving to a more empowering mindset and action-set.   At the same time, you remain connected to all that you know and all that you are, as you learn how to become more, and integrate the new ways of thinking and behaving into daily life.

Although the ‘creative growing edge’ is unknown territory, and you are there alone, it’s nice to know that lots of other people are on their own ‘creative growing edge’ too.   It may feel uncomfortable at times, and this is when commitment helps you out.  You see, from the ‘creative growing edge’ you are able to cross the river of change, from where you are now to where you want to be, but only if you are committed to taking the necessary action steps that will lead to success.

If you are merely dipping your toes in the river of change, you will do some reading, do some listening, do a bit of research, watch a few videos, and get a bit excited about starting something new. You might have some success.  Then some obstacle comes along and you get side tracked, you get waylaid, you forget about change and slip back into the old ways. Every day is a new beginning – in fact, the point of power lies in the present moment.

“The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.” – Chinese proverb

If you are committed, and you have a strong vision of what you want, you will put your heart and soul into it and you will commit 100% to investing your time in doing something that will lead to a successful outcome – a fulfilling, rewarding, enjoyable life that you can feel proud of.

It might seem like there is a great big gap between where you are now and where you want to be.  Like having to jump from one side of the river to the other.  On some days the river is calm and it’s easy to make progress, but on other days the currents try to pull you back.   You just have to remain strong and tap into commitment again.

Would you be surprised to discover that you can bridge the gap and change your mind in one third of a second? That’s the time it takes for your brain to implement a new belief.

You see, the brain works faster than you think.  It works at an incredible speed of around 200 miles per hour.

The brain initiates a response to any circumstance before you are consciously aware of what you are doing, saying or thinking.

It searches through the trillions of neural networks in a flash, and looks for a similar pattern from the past. When it finds one, it gives you the same feeling, thought, or reaction in a split second – something you are familiar with, something that you have felt, thought or responded to in the same way before.  Even though you may not like it or it may not seem appropriate in the current situation, that’s the programme that’s running in the background.

“As you think, you change the structure of your brain.” – Dr. Caroline Leaf

All of this goes on in the subconscious part of the brain, the part of the brain below the level of conscious awareness. This is the place where beliefs and habits live.  If your current beliefs and habits have kept you alive, they form part of your survival instinct.

The brain’s job is to keep you alive by doing, feeling and thinking the same patterns again and again.  It works brilliantly, until you realise that some of the things you do, feel and think are no longer helpful and you want to change.

When you give your brain a new job to do it will do it’s best to help you.  All you need to do is use your powerful imagination in a creative way, stay focused and committed, and implement small incremental habits every day.  You make hundreds of choices every day – each small choice counts.

“Imagination is the beginning of creation. You imagine what you desire, you will what you imagine and at last you create what you will.” – George Bernard Shaw

When you are at the point when you are ready to cross the river of change, there are some things that will help you to take the first step.

1. Identify a compelling reason to change.
2. Lighten the load. Dump the mistakes and regrets from the past, they are heavy burdens that you have been carrying on your shoulders for too long. Bring forward the valuable lessons and knowledge you have learned and build upon them.
3. Set yourself a goal that is possible, plausible and fair and think about what you will need to achieve it. It’s all about having a compelling reason to change, the right mindset, a positive attitude, an optimistic outlook and a willingness to take action every day.
4. If you have physical, mental or emotional issues that are causing problems, get some help. Make it a priority to seek the help you need from a professional.
5. Build a daily routine that includes all the practices for a healthy body and a healthy mind. Exercise, healthy food, and an empowering mindset. Meditation, affirmations, breath work and writing down your thoughts and feelings are all proven techniques that work on establishing new subconscious patterns that will help you along the way.
6. Identify what motivates you, what drives you and what excites you. Connect to and align yourself with these drivers that give you the momentum and the passion to keep going, always remembering your compelling reason for change.
7. Create a vision of “Future You”, who is already living a purposeful and fulfilling life, having achieved success. What would you have to believe in order to be living that happy life?  Find one empowering belief that will help you to get going and start believing that you have what it takes to succeed.  For example: “I am as good as anyone else.”  “I have the right to be happy.”  “It’s ok to feel uncomfortable when I am stepping out of my comfort zone”. “I can do this”.  Or make one up that fits with you. Write it down and post it on the mirror, and other places around your home.  Repeat it many times a day with meaning and intent.
8. Look ahead and focus on where you want to go. Your physical eyes are at the front of your head for a reason. Imagine if you start today, where you will be in three months time? as long as you continue to do what it takes.  What are the micro habits of successful you? What are you doing on a daily basis that you didn’t do before? Crate a winning strategy for success.
9. Write down six amazing benefits that you want to show up in your life and spend some time every day imagining yourself having already achieved them. See yourself engaging in the habits and activities that have got you there.
10. Choose to spend less time with people who bring you down or who gain from keeping you stuck in the same old grove. Make the switch to spend more time with people who uplift and support you in your desire to become a better version of yourself, so you can achieve the goals and wishes you set for yourself.
11. Push yourself every day to step into the unknown, to experience the feelings that come from doing something different. Any nervousness may actually be excitement in disguise.  Discomfort is only a message from your brain that you are stepping into unfamiliar territory.  Remember, the brain likes familiarity and it will always try to pull you back to what’s familiar.  If you get it wrong or make a mistake, that’s ok.  Everyone gets it wrong sometimes, everyone makes mistakes.  Just get up and carry on.
12. Get comfortable with taking a leap of faith. Faith and worry work the same way in the brain, both are trusting in the unknown with a surety that something will happen.  Faith puts a positive spin on things whereas worry puts a negative spin on it.  If something doesn’t work out, take from it what you can and move on.  Some people spend years getting comfortable with a big mistake, because they are afraid to step into the unknown.
13. Think of one small thing you can do today that will help you to move forward, and do it now.
14. Repeat these steps until you are doing what you need to without thinking, without worrying, without fear. Then, your brain will take over and make stepping into the unknown familiar, comfortable and easy.  You will be working from the new belief that you can do it.  An empowering mindset will be the default and your confidence will flourish; you will be well on your way to making your dreams come true.

If you need some help, get in touch for a free consultation.

Mary Bowmer – Heart Focused, Positive Mind, Positive Brain Therapist.